This verse has been one that over the years has popped up on my spiritual radar and always leaves me with the holy conviction to obey it's wisdom. I am in a ladies Bible study of this book of James, and so once again, here it is. So once again, I am looking at this from a different perspective and am faced with the decision which is solely mine, to be quick to listen, slow to speak OR be quick to speak and slow to listen.
It has long been one of my pet peeves to be in a conversation where it's more of an oration than a conversation, a monologue than a dialogue. Some people apparently think what they have to say is most important so they barely take a breath for fear you are going to interrupt and make their point. A while back, I initiated a conversation with a friend about something God was doing in my life so I was sharing some of the scripture and revelation He had brought me in this particular part of my life's journey, when all of the sudden, this friend took over and began to "preach" a sermon to me and expound on the revelation I had begun to share. I was so very conscious of the shift in the conversation that I just shut down and not only did I no longer listen I began to despise that I had even began to share my experience.
When have I not been slow to listen and did the same this this friend did to me? When have I been quick to speak and slow to listen? Probably more times than I care to recall, however since this has been a blip on my spiritual radar, the Holy Spirit reminds me and when I listen to Him, I have chosen to purposely turn off my thoughts, the answer I am going to give, and really listen to what is being said. Sadly, it is not as often as I would like.
There are many reasons why we want to dominate conversations we are involved in, narcissism is one reason. I also believe that people have a sincere desire to help people and they feel like they have the solution or the answer for your "problem", so they not only over share, they share over (their allotted time that good manners allow).
These two things paired together, be slow to speak and quick to listen, but look at that third thing in this scripture says, "and be slow to become angry...". Not only should we listen more, talk less, we should not be quick to become angry. Anger is a valid emotion, James does not say we cannot be angry, in fact Ephesians 4:26 says " be angry, but sin not...".
Anger produces wrath and wrath does not produce the righteousness of God. It is exactly what me eldest son and I were discussing recently, that these negative emotional responses cause the presence of God to "leave". He doesn't have to hang around and listen to us rant and rave about someone He loves. Think about how uncomfortable you feel when someone is railing on someone you love. It is difficult to hear even if it's true. For example, as a young girl, I couldn't stand it when the neighborhood bully picked on my brother, but it was okay for me to. I threatened more than once to go give that bully a piece of my mind.
Today I will refocus my ears to closely listen to what someone is saying, train my mouth to speak only when it's edifying and encouraging, and I will certainly remind myself that anger does not produce Gods righteousness in me, and that's not something I want to squelch or grieve. Blessings...
